The Apocalypse Pantry

A Survivor's Guide to Happiness in the Urban Armageddon

Kattie Pudding

Before refrigeration made it easy to put uneaten food in plastic containers and hide them away from ourselves until they rotted and before western imperialism got us us all eating like 'Mericans, there was the art of Leftovers.   A way of stretching resources and human effort over time while still  aiming to please the palate.   Oatmeal in the age of leftovers,  was kept in a drawer and fermented over days at room temperature.  You'd rise and shine then hack off a chunk of coagulated gluten swarming with probiotics and if you were lucky, a proteiny worm or two, and go bravely about your day.  

Leftover art has been lost to us because it demands seeing and using every part of our food.  We don't even get to see every part of our food. We buy tips and snips of everything.  Everything else goes to a suburb of the Land of Forgotten Toys known locally as the Backwoods of Forgotten Carcasses.  

Bread pudding is pretty well extinct because industrialized bread lasts suppppppeeeerrrrr lonnnngggggg then explodes in mould and is unedible.  The slow natural death of sourdough bread allows for intervention but as mentioned in our whatataa on bread, sourdough is impossible to mass produce making it niche, making it expensive, making it obnoxious unless you are the one making it.     

In this version of bread pudding, the stone fruit pips used to sweeten it also contribute to its bounty in providing perfect sized kattie ammo- bleached and painted to save you time searching through the underbrush for your underbrush coloured pip. 

A Recipe Ode to Kattie Pudding

Proteck yo neck- with this delicious bread pudding!


4 stone fruit

Half a loaf of stale sourdough bread

Sour milk or cream



Sweet Spices


-Whisk together your sour milk and or cream with a couple eggs, honey and spices

-Rip bread apart into bite sized pieces and place in baking dish

-Chop up fruit and scatter amongst bread bits

-Cover in milky mix and let sit for an hour.  

-If milky mix is completely absorbed and bread still looks like it could soak up some more, do a second round of half the amount of milky mix

-Once all milky mix is soaked up by the bread, bake in the oven until the top has browned and the custard is congealed